they should rename the USA channel the law and order channel...

because everytime i turn on channel 34 (USA network) there is an episode of law and order on. other channels at least make an effort to show other stuff sometimes. not usa. once in a while they'll show an episode of monk or something, but the rest of the time it's law and order. and i don't really like law and order, so it doesn't work very well for me...

i went to linens-n-things last night to try and spend a gift card on some towels that actually match my bathroom (because mine are yellow, pink, and maroon in a bathroom that's silver, black, and white). i had to leave without buying anything because the selection was overwhelming. i called my mom today and we figured out what i'm going to buy and how i'm going to arrange the towels. i feel better. i'm going back tomorrow.

i went apartment hunting today and found a couple that i like. there are a few more that weren't open that i'll have to revisit this week. i'm hopeful. the last time i went i was mostly on the south side of time, and this time i stayed north, and they are A LOT cheaper up here. and a lot of them don't charge any extra for pets per month which is cool.

so i was watching gilmore girls this week and it was the episode where rory goes off to college and it got me thinking (which is either pathetic or impressive. impressive that i can use anything, even gilmore girls to stimulate profound thoughts; or pathetic that i was watching that instead of reading the new yorker or something). there are a lot of big moments in life. some you don't remember: birth, first steps, first words, potty training, etc. and some you think will be a big deal, but they're too quick: college graduation (3.7 seconds walking across stage), high school graduation, getting your first job, first paycheck, first kiss etc. some actually have the weight you expect, but the circumstances make it so that they don't feel like you think they should. for example, when mom and dad left me here in las vegas, i should have felt strange or cried or something, but i had to immediately deal with las vegas airport traffic and so my focus was directed elsewhere.

anyway, in that episode there's the moment when rory hugs her mom goodbye and her mom leaves and she walks into her dorm room alone. i remembered that moment. it's really a busy day. you get there and you have to move all your stuff up three flights of stairs and you meet your roommate and you have to rearrange the room four different ways to get it all to fit and then you have to figure out how to fit all your clothes in the absurdly small dresser they give you and you have to make your bed and get some lunch and then you go to a meeting and your parents go to a meeting and you have to do all these things all day and then, all of a sudden, you go out to your parents car and they drive away and you don't and you walk back to your dorm room and sit down and that's it. and i don't care how far away your college is, it's a weird moment. because, for the first time, you're not living at home. and it's sad. before i went to college, i had traveled, i had gone to camp for one or two weeks at a time, i had been apart from them and i had never been homesick. and that day i was so homesick. the first time i called home a couple days later i cried a little. it was just really bizarre to go back to my room and not have it be upstairs from my parents in the kitchen. and i don't really know how to explain it, and it's something that anyone who has moved away to college like that will understand. you just have this huge feeling of "i'm older now. nothing will every be exactly like it was."

i saw the cutest dog today. chow and akita mix. 9 lbs. tan. so sweet. i want one.

i'm excited because it's almost tax season and i think i'm getting rebate this year. at least i hope i am. we'll see.

so there is a website called postsecret.com (it's in the new all american rejects video "dirty little secret") and the whole point is that people put secrets on anonymous postcards and mail them to an address and then this guy has a website out of them. it's amazing. i suggest checking it out. there is also a book and i bought it last night. it's amazing. in the 10 minutes i looked through it in the store, i found at least 4 secrets that i share. some are funny, some are serious, but they're just so amazing. they're these little pieces of someone's life that they share with the world. best $20 i ever spent.

i'm thinking about dropping cable, because it causes me to waste so much time, but i know i'll mist abc family and hgtv. and vh1. and tbs. the thing is, the tv is my friend; the person who talks to me in the evening when i'm here alone and without it my apartment would be very quiet and sad. and i would have no friends. but i would get a lot more done. i would read more, i would play the piano more, etc.

i don't watch the OC. i never have. i saw it the first time when it was called 90210. but i do watch fox sometimes and i've noticed that they've introed a new character who is marissa's sister and is "the bad girl." which is something they also did on 90210. remember tiffany amber theissen as valerie? bad girl. and just a question: i seem to remember brenda and brandon's parents dying in a horrific car wreck or something? please let me know if that's correct.

i think that's all i got for now. i'm going to watch extreme makeover: home edition and go to bed. another 4-day school week this week. man, my life is tough... (that was for you mom)